Categorized | Point of View, Politics
Women and Progress … Are We There Yet?
by hardybear
Posted on 02 November 2009 | 11:10 pm 
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Dulcinea, Anahi DeCanio.
I am woman, hear me roar, in numbers too big to ignore,
and I know too much to go back an’ pretend.
’cause I’ve heard it all before, and I’ve been down there on the floor,
no one’s ever gonna keep me down again.
Oh yes, I am wise, but it’s wisdom born of pain.
Yes, I’ve paid the price, but look how much I gained.
If I have to, I can do anything … I am strong (strong), I am invincible (invincible) …
I am woman.
You can bend but never break me, ’cause it only serves to make me, more determined to achieve my final goal.
And I come back even stronger, not a novice any longer, ’cause you’ve deepened the conviction in my soul.
~ Helen Reddy
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Since the first Puritan cocked his imposing buckled hat and stepped arrogantly off the Mayflower, culture and society on these shores have undervalued women. The fairer sex has been determined inferior in intellect, character and morality by generation after generation of American men. Men who ruled the roost, wrote the laws, controlled the finances and waged the wars … much as they had globally since the dawn of Western civilization as we know it. (And as male historians have largely documented it.)
With the advent of the recently published Shriver Report, and a focus collectively termed A Woman’s Nation, we have been prompted to ask a studious and reflective question: where do we stand now? How have things progressed for women looking at nearly four centuries in America? As you might anticipate, the reviews are mixed.
We are assuredly no longer in the era where aspirations beyond marriage, housewifery and motherhood were radical and revolutionary. My eleven year-old niece can actively seek an education and career in virtually any field, from Angiology to Zootonomy, thanks to the barrier-busting women who came and conquered before her. She can catch an episode of period drama Mad Men, and sincerely ask if things were really that bad for women ‘back then’ (the sixties). We would explain about more women entering universities and the work force, speak of the revolution of the Women’s Movement in the seventies, of burning bras, of Ms. Magazine and of Gloria Steinem … about the miraculous liberator that was The Pill. Yes, things were that bad back then, we would tell her. We should be grateful, we should be proud. Yet she also knew that her mother, aunt and grandmother wept quietly when Hillary Clinton suspended her campaign for president in 2008, before they went out to support Obama.
Being a modern woman is often thus, a breathless balance of exhilarating progress and bone-deep despair.
My Secret Garden, Anahi DeCanio.
The advent of the blogosphere has given women something every oppressed group needs desperately ~ a voice. A place to speak their hearts and minds without the editing pen or censorious, demeaning eyes of a male dominated media. It offers women more opportunities to be heard than Better Homes and Gardens, Good Housekeeping and Cosmopolitan magazines, and strips the historic restraints away from the scope of permitted subject matter. A century and a half ago I might have been glued to a coveted copy of Godey’s Lady’s Book, giddy with the coup of being among the first to be cognizant of the bustle as this season’s fashion must-have. Today I’m riveted by two open browser windows of dynamic articles at Wonkette and Citizen Jane Politics, neither of which have anything to do with sporting copious ruffles on my arse when I’m not even rigged out as a bridesmaid.
As with any progressive advance of freedom, there is negative potential. Much as a rampantly sexist government managed to turn itself on a dime and issue propaganda encouraging women to suit up and show up for factory work during World War II, the conservative movement in 2008 largely managed to support Sarah Palin as the next Great Republican Hope. The fundamentalist Christian legacy of complementarianism, which is unequivocally based on traditional, Biblical roles for women that ‘complement’ men, forced many conservative religious leaders to issue their own landmark propaganda; much of which was disseminated via the internets. It was expedient to do so, even though conservatives in general and evangelical Christians in particular, want few things more desperately than to have women barefoot, pregnant and subjugated. Naturally, there was a class of right wing theosophers who found the propaganda heinous and too progressive, a decided threat to their natural order. Brother Bill Einwechter, pastor of Immanuel Free Reformed Church in Denver, Pennsylvania, was one of the Palin objectors. He wrote, at right wing blog The American View, of the catastrophic, looming dangers of La Palin and her traitorous, unprincipled Christian supporters.
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They have denied, at least in part, the biblical doctrine of the created order of male headship, and the biblical doctrine of the unique, non-transferable roles of men and women in God’s plan. By defending the propriety of a mother of young children ruling over the nation, they have undermined the doctrine of male headship and women as keepers at home. They validate the feminist vision of womanhood as it is personified in Sarah Palin. This feminist vision is the arch enemy of the biblical vision of the godly woman who is the helper of her husband, the nurturer of her children, and the keeper of her home. And so, intended or not, their stance is a tragic betrayal of the cause of restoring Christian womanhood and the biblical family.
Doug Phillips wrote these sobering words; “The widespread acceptance of a pro-life professing Christian Republican, self-proclaimed feminist mother of an infant and four children as a candidate for the highest office of the land is the single most dangerous event for the conscience of the Christian community of the last ten years at least. The IQ of the Christian community has dropped 50 points. In order to win an election they have sold the core of what is right and true about the defining issue of our generation„the family! Once this threshold is passed, it will be virtually impossible apart from widespread repentance to recapture this ground.” …
Sarah Palin identifies herself with the anti-Christian philosophy of feminism. She uses feminist terminology, identifies with feminist political objectives, publicly praises liberal icons of the feminist movement, and has built her lifestyle around the feminist ideal of motherhood and careerism. She represents the feminist lie that a woman can do it all, that she can be a wife and mother and pursue a full-time career outside of her home and still meet all her responsibilities in the home. She personifies the feminist image of the tough, take-charge woman who is fitted to rule and govern in any sphere she chooses. She establishes the feminist principle that if a woman can do something, and she wants to do it, she ought to do it; there should be no constraints placed on her by her family, her church, or her society.
I Now Pronounce You Eve and Eve, Anahi DeCanio.
Many will point to the 2008 race and say that seeing Hillary Clinton and Sarah Palin on those campaign stages proves that the women’s movement has achieved it’s goals, we should pick up our skirts and declare the battle won. I couldn’t disagree more, the mission is by no means accomplished. We have just read the Christian conservative perspective. Now, stop and ponder how many venues in which it is still a rarity to sight a woman: the cockpit of a commercial airplane; the luxe office of a top dog on Wall Street or in Hollywood; in the uniform of a five-star general; at the highest-paid microphones on Hate Radio; behind the wheel of a semi or a nuclear submarine; sitting at the owner’s/editor’s desk of a major newspaper or magazine; or bearing the stethescope and authority of a Chief of Surgery. Examine the diminished percentage of wages earned, the higher numbers of women living in poverty, the incidence of comments like one recently recommending that Speaker Nancy Pelosi return to her ‘place’. Examine also, things that were more or less accepted and acceptable during the last year, including the South Park episode that featured terrorists secreting a bomb in Hillary Clinton’s vagina, and Michelle Obama depicted with a gun and guerilla gear on the cover of The New Yorker.
There is absolutely no doubt about it, much has changed for women in my lifetime. Yet perhaps because of that, because they will never have to be ‘the first’ or ‘the only’, many younger women merrily believe that feminism and it’s causes are over … passé, accomplished, been there done that and “so your generation, Mom.” As American women, they justifiably feel privileged, fortunate. Paradoxically, we are seeing the sexualization of American girls happen at younger and younger ages. They see genital mutilation in various countries and feel gratitude for their liberated culture and advanced society. Yet do they know that presently an aspirational pop-surgery in California is a labia reduction, a designer vagina? That standout example alone reaffirms that our vision is still unfinished, our sisters and daughters and are still subject to patriarchal, conservative christian/Puritan, sexist values.. Our lives are still often grossly undervalued and chronically unfulfilled.
Ergo, much like the reality that the election of a black president didn’t eradicate racism in America, the progress made by and for women is laudable but yet unfinished, and in need of committed hard work. I particularly related to this segment of Susan J. Douglas’s contribution to the Shriver Report, in an essay titled “Where Have You Gone, Roseanne Barr?”
Feminism is now embedded in American life. The understanding that women can and should be able to hold the same jobs as men has led to TV shows such as “The Closer” and “Grey’s Anatomy.” At the very same time, feminism and feminists have been so thoroughly and effectively demonized in American society—Rush Limbaugh, for example, equating them with Nazis33—that it is hard to think of a political group or movement that has had such a great impact on American life while at the same time being so discredited.
This rests on a new “common sense” in the media about the status of women. Allegedly, the women’s movement has been such a complete success that full equality with men is a fact, and so feminism is supposedly irrelevant now. Feminists have been stereotyped—in the news, books, movies, and television shows—as strident, humorless, deliberately unattractive, anti-family women who hate men and wish to make young women as unhappy as they are. Consequently, not only is feminism unnecessary because all its goals have supposedly been achieved, but also it is objectionable because it will make those who embrace it unattractive, unloved, and miserable.
Cosmopolitain, Anahi DeCanio.
If I believed in hades, I would expect to see this Madeleine Albright quote displayed prominently there: “There is a special place in hell for women who don’t help other women.”
Whatever motivates us as women, be it poverty, wage disparity, discrimination, sexism, rage, compassion or simple love of our daughters and sisters; let it lead us to positive places. I don’t believe men are consistently the enemy in this new phase of redefining ourselves, but will likely be our partners and perhaps even our occasional champions.
And sisters, we can certainly do it for ourselves ~ but extending a hand to another woman, keeping those connections strong, is the least we can do to further the empowerment given us by the brave and beautiful ones who came before.
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The women I agreed with the most, back in the 60’s, when I was in the movements, were the ones who said that true equality would not be acheived until a woman was allowed to bring her femininity to whatever task she was attempting. They, I, and many others, argued that having women succeed by becoming men, in all but physicality, defeats the purpose. The hope, back then, was that the feminine qualities that women have – nuturing, emotional acceptance – could be brought into politics, business, and yes, religion. We felt that those qualities, if brought to bear on the issues of the world would have nothing but a positive effect, countering the male ego contests that so many endeavors become.
The problem, as others have pointed out, is that, to compete, women have to adopt the attitudes of men. This defeats the purpose, but it’s, unfortunately, still necessary in most fields.
No answers here – it’s still a long road ahead.
November 2nd, 2009 at 10:09 pm
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Such a great point, Ex. No matter the field or the level, pretending to be someone or something you’re not is guaranteed to end badly.
Great to see you, sir!
I’ve been missing you.
November 2nd, 2009 at 10:16 pm
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Thanks. And I forgot – great post. Thanks for including the point about women being the biggest impediment to progress..
As I said in a comment on MsDoc’s piece, it’s easy to paint a man with the “male chauvinist pig” brush, but much harder to counter a woman who stands up and defend the patriarchy. Phyllis Schlafly did more to run out the clock on the ERA than a hundred men. I’m not excusing mens involvement, but it’s women who have, and have had the voting majority in this country for a long time – they also have, and have had, HUGE influence over men.
Progress will be made when WOMEN decide it will be – men will have little to say about it if women unite.
November 2nd, 2009 at 11:22 pm
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It’s so much easier to organize around a cause when there is dramatic injustice … ‘almost there’ isn’t the best motivator.
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Little Sally Draper is no dummy … I think something big could happen with her soon
November 1st, 2009 at 11:37 pm
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She does seem a deep one. Bets is such a complex character. Oddities crop up, like in Rome, she out of the blue spoke excellent Italian.
They really do a great job with depth for the female characters, I think. Joanie fascinates me.
November 2nd, 2009 at 10:52 pm
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and the slinking into the shower. she is deeply complex, yet plays it in complete monotone for the most part.
really impressed with the acting of little Sally. The facials coming from a young girl is quite amazing.
the show is brilliant
November 2nd, 2009 at 10:54 pm
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btw, do you thing Salvatore will be coming back? I love that character.
November 2nd, 2009 at 11:18 pm
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Salvatore was terrific.
Getting sidetracked by TDS, John Oliver slays me.
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ewwwwww! I could have lived w/o the nude shot of John Lithgow!
November 1st, 2009 at 10:19 pm
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Ewww indeed! I missed it, decided I needed to make dinner. I will watch it again after I eat.
November 1st, 2009 at 10:20 pm
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November 1st, 2009 at 10:23 pm
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Ruh roh, the episode of Mad Men I’d been dreading seems to have arrived. Dallas.
November 1st, 2009 at 10:24 pm
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Yeah… bummer of an episode.
November 1st, 2009 at 11:18 pm
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I’m guessing it’s going to be quite a turning point for the show.
I see Bets is already becoming a different person.
interesting
November 1st, 2009 at 11:20 pm
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Feels like the proverbial sea change.
November 1st, 2009 at 10:25 pm
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I had no idea…
November 1st, 2009 at 10:28 pm
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They have captured it incredibly well, I think. Made me cry, handily.
November 1st, 2009 at 10:25 pm
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Good goddess, that’s a powerful moment. Even in period drama.
November 1st, 2009 at 10:29 pm
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And, to your post, the guy comes in and tells the woman to “take a pill and lay down” to help her feelings of sadness over the president being assassinated. WTF?
November 1st, 2009 at 10:32 pm
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1963.
November 1st, 2009 at 10:43 pm
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I can’t even imagine. I am not fond of being dismissed like that and it is probably a good thing I wasn’t born until later.
November 1st, 2009 at 10:47 pm
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November 1st, 2009 at 10:51 pm
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Man, that was wild when Oswald’s shooting was broadcast live. First time ever, a live murder. I never visualized it like that before.
November 1st, 2009 at 10:57 pm
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My parents still talk about it from time to time.
I imagine it as how it would be if something unfortunate would happen today.
November 1st, 2009 at 10:59 pm
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Absolutely. Particularly with the youtubes.
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looks like Scozzfava is quietly endorsing the Dem in NY23 now — let’s see if she comes out and publicly says it, along with her supporters.
It’s War!
This case will mark the official split of the Party if Hoffman wins
November 1st, 2009 at 9:46 pm
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Snap, I was working up a post on that and got sidetracked, will get it up for the morning.
Very peculiar, if you ask me.
November 1st, 2009 at 10:02 pm
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pretty important moment, IMO.
if the conservatives prove they can truly kick out an estab. GOP candidate, it’s going to get awfully crazy … as if it’s not already enough
November 1st, 2009 at 10:18 pm
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Got the post up. Am eager to hear the reactions tomorrow. hehe.
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http://www.shakerworkshops.com/catalog/view/textiles/Rooster-M ay-Crow-Pillow/11R42
heh…
November 1st, 2009 at 9:44 pm
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Dextah Time!
November 1st, 2009 at 9:05 pm
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November 1st, 2009 at 9:06 pm
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Isn’t it six pm where you are?
November 1st, 2009 at 9:35 pm
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I get Eastee channels for a lot of the cable networks
November 1st, 2009 at 9:44 pm
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Which is very nice for us chickens. Anyone catch the nouveau Curb?
November 1st, 2009 at 9:51 pm
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Weird true but odd fact… I have never seen that show.
November 1st, 2009 at 10:17 pm
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No Way José! It’s brilliant, in a word.
November 1st, 2009 at 10:20 pm
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Many people say that… am trying to watch Mad Men now, but have no clue what is going on.
November 1st, 2009 at 10:04 pm
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not yet. I usually decompress with Curb after Dex and MadMen
November 1st, 2009 at 10:17 pm
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Good strategy.
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Off topic but rather funny from Richard Dawkins…
http://bit.ly/1aMLn5
Dracula, Frankenstein, and Jesus.
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Okay, I really mean it this time.
Goodnight Dick.
Goodnight Gracie.
Goodnight John-Boy.
Goodnight Mrs Calabash, wherever you are.
November 1st, 2009 at 8:48 pm
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Night babe…. x
November 1st, 2009 at 8:51 pm
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Goodnight Moon….
Read by Susan Sarandon…
Sorry Bear, had to indulge.
November 1st, 2009 at 8:52 pm
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Why you sorry?! That looks really cool, will enjoy it in a bit.
November 1st, 2009 at 9:10 pm
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It was my very first favorite book. My grandpa used to read it to me all the time…
Interesting how women tend to be the leaders in fiction for children. Seems obvious why, of course, but besides the Caldecott award not much recognition has been given to women writers in general.
November 2nd, 2009 at 6:45 am
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I read it to my daughter at night. We loved it. It was very calming.
November 1st, 2009 at 8:58 pm
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She really is one of the most respected Childrens Author though, so it is actually fitting.
Beatrix Potter too and such…
November 1st, 2009 at 9:43 pm
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I like Peter Rabbit almost as much as Paddington and Pooh.
November 1st, 2009 at 9:52 pm
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Peter Rabbit was very naughty.
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“God foist made Adam, Then he made Eve from a rib…a cheaper cut.”
~Archie Bunker
November 1st, 2009 at 8:24 pm
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(Hope I got the smiley right!)
November 1st, 2009 at 8:29 pm
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Hehehehe… Archie
November 1st, 2009 at 8:56 pm
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All In The Family and Maude could never be made today on broadcast television.
November 1st, 2009 at 9:14 pm
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You’re right, but… I am glad they were made.
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I swore up and down I was going to bed as soon as I finished work at midnight and here it is almost three in the morning and I’m still shooting it with you lot of degenerates! I’m off now, I have candy bars and diet coke in the cabin and a nice warm bunk and the ship is rocking just enough to lull me off to sleep. I’ll leave you all with one more gag related to the topic of the post….
Adam says to God, “What is this thing you’ve made for me?”
God says, “That is woman.”
“Why did you make her so warm and soft and curvy?”
“So you’ll like her.”
“Why did you make her so stupid?”
“So she’ll like you!”
All right… One more….
A newlywed couple is getting undressed in the honmeymoon suite. The guy takes off his pants and tosses them to his bride, saying, “Put these on.” She steps into them and pulls them up but they immediately fall down again. She says, “I can’t wear these.” He says, “Exactly…. I’m the one that wears the pants around here.”
The wife takes off her panties and tosses them to the guy and says, “Okay… Put these on.” He steps into them but they’re way too tight and he can’t get them pulled up. He says, “I can’t get into your pants.” She says, “That’s right, and you won’t until you change your attitude.”
November 1st, 2009 at 8:12 pm
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yeah, how’d that whole “stupid” thing work out?
oh, wait! now I get it … now I understand why Quitbull and Batshit are “God’s women”
November 1st, 2009 at 8:16 pm
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That’s a gag one has to be careful with…. It can easily get taken the wrong way!
November 1st, 2009 at 8:16 pm
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Thanks for the giggle Indy… off to bed with you!
November 1st, 2009 at 8:23 pm
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“A woman should cleave into her husband. Right here in this house is where Edith’s cleavage belongs.”
~Archie Bunker
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Very well written article, Hardybear.
After the gay high holy day celebration last night, my eyes are just now focused enough to read.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:59 pm
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November 1st, 2009 at 8:01 pm
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Everything was fine until the dogs stomped across the bedroom carpet this morning.
November 1st, 2009 at 8:02 pm
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Little Clemmie stomping?
(what’s the name of the new pup?)
November 1st, 2009 at 8:07 pm
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Maggie.
I named her after Princess Margaret.
She’ll always be the little sister who gets into trouble.
November 1st, 2009 at 8:13 pm
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and always flies under the radar
November 1st, 2009 at 8:19 pm
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Not P.Maggie…. that was her trouble!!!!!
The “It” girl of her day!!!
November 1st, 2009 at 8:23 pm
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But the Queen wouldn’t let her marry the guitar player from The Who.
….wot?…. That was a different Peter Townsend?
November 1st, 2009 at 8:29 pm
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She probably did that Townsend also too
November 1st, 2009 at 8:32 pm
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Not so sure…. From what I’ve heard, you’d have a better shot with him.
November 1st, 2009 at 8:37 pm
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EP’s too old ……he’s into kids.
November 1st, 2009 at 8:44 pm
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Remember that affair she had with John Biden….. the gangster who was so ‘talented’, that his party trick was to dangle 5 half-pint mugs of his app-end-age…(Channeling Bette Midler)…. and the hoo-ha over the millions “Bank robbery” which they reckon was a smokescreen by ’spooks’ to get the photies from the safe boxes of them having it off on the beach in Mustique……
Hope that EP’s Maggie is better behaved…… our Maggie was anyones’ for a doughnut!!!
November 1st, 2009 at 9:05 pm
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Funny thing is, she would naff them and then DEMAND that they cal her YRH or Ma’am
November 1st, 2009 at 9:09 pm
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One has to keep a sense of decorum when one is shagging a gangster on a beach, EP………. One doesn’t want to let the side down, you know, shock the servants or startle the horses….. sheeeeesh,
Did you know she did Warren Beatty as well??
November 1st, 2009 at 8:20 pm
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Well then, best get her spayed and hide the gin…….
November 1st, 2009 at 8:12 pm
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WeHo was mad High Holy Days … per yoosh
November 1st, 2009 at 8:14 pm
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Oh… Now you show up, just when I’m promising myself I’ll get to bed. You should have been here last night…. Halloween on a cruise ship…. I was up to my armpits in poofters… You’d have loved it!
November 1st, 2009 at 8:19 pm
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If you really want to see a gay Halloween — go to New Orleans one year.
November 1st, 2009 at 8:21 pm
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I can imagine. Lahaina is pretty wild, too.
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Wonder if Maria rolled up the report and beat the shit out of Aaaahhhhhhhnuld with it?
November 1st, 2009 at 7:55 pm
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November 1st, 2009 at 7:57 pm
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He’d probably enjoy it. “I’ll be baacckkkk….”
November 1st, 2009 at 8:00 pm
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LOL! Eggxactly!
November 1st, 2009 at 8:13 pm
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the big dogs really can be dumb
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WTF Stephanopoulos????? Presdient Obama responsible for the divisiveness????
November 1st, 2009 at 7:39 pm
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!!! Oh for crying out loud.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:40 pm
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How do you make the banging-head-against-the-wall smiley? It would be appropriate.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:43 pm
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One of my faves.
:b g h d: without the spaces.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:42 pm
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see what the whole Bipartisan Addiction gets ya’
November 1st, 2009 at 7:42 pm
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He has been really good at making me forget why I liked him a billion years ago.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:47 pm
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Totally.
November 1st, 2009 at 8:01 pm
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Hey Noch, here’s the site for that fruitcake place, just FYI.
http://www.collinstreet.com/
November 1st, 2009 at 8:10 pm
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MUCH better fruitcakes:
http://www.southernsupreme.com/
November 1st, 2009 at 8:18 pm
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Really??? Thanks! I’ll have to give it a try!
November 1st, 2009 at 8:22 pm
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Both of the links I gave you make the best. Not a lot of candied fruit in them. Real old fashioned fruitcakes with dried fruit instead.
November 1st, 2009 at 8:25 pm
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Mmmm. And the pecans? Tasty?
November 1st, 2009 at 8:12 pm
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This one is fab, also too
http://www.vermontcountrystore.com/browse/Home/Food-Candy/Baked-Goods/ Vermont-Harvest-Cake/D/30100/P/1:100:1020:100630/I/f07987?endecaid=FCX XXXFEBN01
November 1st, 2009 at 8:22 pm
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This sounds good, too. I’ve bookmarked both.
November 1st, 2009 at 8:22 pm
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That one I can vouch for, being a stones throw from Weston and a loyal customer.
Old Cavendish is also too quite excellent: http://www.cavendishfruitcake.com/
November 1st, 2009 at 8:27 pm
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Oh, this is great. I should order a couple more for my parents from yours and EP’s places – one cake from Collin St. is already on the way. They’re having their big annual Peace Party in a few weeks – they can do some taste testing!
November 1st, 2009 at 7:55 pm
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Once a Clintonista, always a Clintonista.
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Got another biblical one for yez….
Adam said to Eve, “You’d better stand back, I don’t know how big this thing gets.”
November 1st, 2009 at 7:26 pm
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Eve better get a damn machete.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:27 pm
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kidding,,,,, kidding,,,,,
November 1st, 2009 at 7:28 pm
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Lorena?
November 1st, 2009 at 7:30 pm
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LMAO!
November 1st, 2009 at 7:27 pm
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November 1st, 2009 at 7:29 pm
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I thought he said “Brace yourself”
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Great piece, Hardybear. I have to admit that I know one hell of a lot of women who are better at their jobs than their male counterparts. I say that as an old school male who never learned to type until I was 40 because I always had a secretary.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:19 pm
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You always had a secretary?
‘Leetist!
November 1st, 2009 at 7:29 pm
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Everyone in management did back then up until the end of the ’80s.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:31 pm
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Typing is such a great skill to have. One of the most useful classes I took in high school.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:34 pm
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I wish I had taken it. I’m better than I used to be, but my wife still ridicules my four finger method.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:40 pm
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You can still type pretty fast with four!
November 1st, 2009 at 7:44 pm
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I learned on a manual typewriter. Seems like forever ago, but my pinky has not forgotten the “A” key
November 1st, 2009 at 7:46 pm
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You learned on a manual typewriter, too? We had to have strong fingers, huh!
November 1st, 2009 at 7:54 pm
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LOL!
November 1st, 2009 at 8:15 pm
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I still haul out the Royal on occasion, there’s something soothing about using it. I’m only getting really comfortable keyboarding of late, and still write longhand a lot.
November 1st, 2009 at 8:33 pm
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I absolutely love writing longhand. Such a shame that the handwritten letter is seen as so passe these days.
November 1st, 2009 at 8:33 pm
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Heh… I sound like I am 95.
November 1st, 2009 at 8:45 pm
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Couldn’t agree more, and I use a fountain pen.
November 1st, 2009 at 8:47 pm
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Pstttttt… that’s ANOTHER thing I collect….. old pens.
I always try to write my letters longhand… nice decal edged paper…..A pen just feels so nice in your hand.
November 1st, 2009 at 8:50 pm
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I remember, we chatted right after my Mont Blanc returned from the pen hospital.
Just got some really cool seals and wax from eBay UK, actually.
November 1st, 2009 at 8:51 pm
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Nice old ones????
November 1st, 2009 at 7:54 pm
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My wife learned on a manual and she’s blazing fast.
November 1st, 2009 at 8:01 pm
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My typing teacher was a drill Sargent in disguise… there is no way I will ever forget how to type.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:34 pm
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The Mavis Beacon disk got me to stop using the “Biblical Method” of typing…. Seek and ye shall find.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:39 pm
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but now you need to be able to do it with your thumbs …
November 1st, 2009 at 7:40 pm
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I’m a one finger iPhoner.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:44 pm
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I have an iPod – and I’ve done a bit of blogging/emailing on that – what a pain. My fingers are way too fat!
November 1st, 2009 at 7:44 pm
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Me too mostly… iTouch, everything but the phone.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:47 pm
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Ah -that’s what I have. I’m always getting these iPod thingies mixed up. It’s everything but the phone.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:55 pm
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You need wi-fi to connect, but I really love it. So amazingly handy to have. Like a mini laptop
November 1st, 2009 at 8:16 pm
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I really hate when the iThingy tries to think for me
November 1st, 2009 at 8:12 pm
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Me too,but it helps to have the qwerty background, I think.
November 1st, 2009 at 8:18 pm
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Oh noes! Qwerty!
November 1st, 2009 at 8:46 pm
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My typing teacher was a drill sergeant, as well.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:33 pm
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Just pullin’ your plonker, EDV.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:32 pm
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Merci, EdV. Would love to get more of the male perspective.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:37 pm
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What am I? Chopped liver?
November 1st, 2009 at 7:40 pm
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not exactly … I was thinking more like Top Shelf
November 1st, 2009 at 7:51 pm
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I second that emotion.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:56 pm
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You’re too kind!
November 1st, 2009 at 7:40 pm
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November 1st, 2009 at 7:57 pm
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Back at ya!
November 1st, 2009 at 7:41 pm
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Sorry Indey, I’m on the iThingey and working from the top down. Did email you earlier, though.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:47 pm
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My greatest challenge is trying to answer business correspondence while riding the MetroRail. One good bump and off goes half a thought.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:50 pm
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I’m oft embarrassed by the Premature Send.
November 1st, 2009 at 8:16 pm
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November 1st, 2009 at 7:55 pm
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I consider myself lucky if I can ever complete half a thought1
November 1st, 2009 at 7:56 pm
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Ya did? I didn’t get one (not since yesterday when you so graciously fixed my post for me).
November 1st, 2009 at 8:10 pm
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Nutz, I’ll resend when off the iPhone/back to la pooter.
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I remember having a conversation with a friend (a pretty radical lesbian) back in my home town, and she said that it’d be a better world if women ran it – part of her proof? Men invented the bomb – -women didn’t. Argh.
I really dislike essentialist justifications – I said that women, given half the chance, can be just as twisted as men. It was easy for men to invent the bomb because I’d bet you could count the number of female Physics majors in college in the 1920s/30s – let alone PhD’s — and let alone any female PhD’s in Physics who could get a damn JOB using their degree.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:18 pm
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Very true…
November 1st, 2009 at 7:20 pm
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Quite… The distaff side is just as capable of rottenness as we hairy-ass males.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:29 pm
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Power breeds Evil
November 1st, 2009 at 7:34 pm
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And the lust for power.
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Stop me if you’ve heard this one (it’s actually on topic).
Adam said to God, “You’ve been awfully busy lately and I’m getting lonely. Any chance you could build another fella to keep me company? Y’know, someone that likes the same things as I do, someone that’ll agree with me on everything.”
God says, “I dunno, man, that’s a big job…. It’ll cost you an arm and a leg.”
Adam says, “Okay… What can I get for a rib?”
November 1st, 2009 at 7:13 pm
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Indy -are you still traveling?
November 1st, 2009 at 7:15 pm
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At this very moment I’m a couple of hours out of Athens…. Well, Pireaus, actually. It’s a little port town half an hour from Athens by train. I haven’t been to Athens yet but I’ve walked around Pireaus a couple of times saying, “Jeez, what a dump!” Have a look at “A Band On Ship…. Stormy Weather” (I think it’s still on the front page) and you’ll see it’s not all skittles and beer.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:18 pm
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Will take a look! You’re out until January or some such??
You going to Crete? I loved it (oh, 25 yrs ago when I last visited!)
November 1st, 2009 at 7:23 pm
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December 12. Don’t think I’m going to Crete but we have Egypt, Malta and Cyprus coming up and after I sign off, the ship will move to Dubai as home port.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:25 pm
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Isn’t Crete incredible? Planning to get Dave there next year, been a long time since my last visit as well.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:28 pm
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It was so beautiful! Sounds like a great trip with Dave.
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I’m as much of a feminist as I imagine a feller can be, but I still like opening doors for you lot and helping you carry your bags and such. On the other hand, I get pissed off when a lady rails about equality and then complain when I tell a smutty joke.
Dammit…. Right there, I’ve said “I want to have it both ways but I object to you having it both ways.”
That’s why I’m not a philosopher, I guess.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:51 pm
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I’m coming in late to the conversation, but I think the bit about feminists not wanting doors opened for them is a bunch of hooey- I think almost all feminists (and I count myself as one) don’t mind that a bit. That’s just being polite!
November 1st, 2009 at 7:24 pm
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I open doors for men and women, common courtesy.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:45 pm
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It sure is.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:53 pm
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Never complained….. may have had the odd maidenly blush……
November 1st, 2009 at 6:55 pm
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I like smutty jokes and having the door opened for me…
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ruh roh … Gen McChrystal approved the paperwork for the Pat Tillman coverup story?!?!?!
Do Not Fuck With this Admin., Gen., your secrets are not safe!!!!
November 1st, 2009 at 6:44 pm
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Ooooooooooo…
So not cool.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:49 pm
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Thought he said he just didn’t read it properly?He misread “Friendly fire” fo “Enemy Fire”….. which would have made the awarding of the Silver Star invalid.???
The goy who’s written the book reckons that’s just not credible, ……. and that’s what all the hoo-ha is about… (I think!!)
November 1st, 2009 at 6:49 pm
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Guy.
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Hardybear…. How the hell do you find time to make a living, edit things on this site, help out helpless clarinet players who can’t remember the procedures and still write long and wonderful articles like this?
Can I put in my two cents?
The difference between men and women as perceived by the lag-behind one-tooth types is, like their religious and economic beliefs, firmly rooted in out-of-date ideas. There was a time when barefoot and pregnant made perfect sense, a time when having fifteen children was a necessity since only a couple of them were likely to survive till adulthood. There was a time when men, being bigger and stronger and not tied down by pregnancy and child-rearing, had no choice but to be the leaders and protectors just as there was a time when the stories in the Bible made perfect sense to bronze-age people who needed a rational explanation for things at the level of their understanding. The Bible reinforced the difference of the gender roles and educated everyone accordingly and at the time it was basically right. Unfortunately, those who would retain the status quo in the battle of the sexes are still wrapped up in bronze-age thinking. In this modern world, we men have no actual advantage based on our size and strength since machines are able to equalise those factors. We never did have an advantage in intelligence but we exploited the ability we had to devote time to education that women couldn’t afford to spare being too busy with raising kids. Now that the overwhelming percentage of kids actually survive their early years, women have access to education that was previously denied to them. America seems to be the last holdout in the equality of the sexes race as far as developed nations go just as it is bottom of the class in pretty much every progressive movement one can think of.
That’s it…. No more thinky stuff from me. We now resume normal programming.
Tittys and beer!
November 1st, 2009 at 6:08 pm
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well, if you really want to go back to “there was time when” — look to the wild kingdom where many species, much like earlier humans, the female not only does the child-bearing and rearing, but also does the bulk of the hunting and gathering.
it’s basically a scenario of sperm donors and single mothers.
sound familiar?
November 1st, 2009 at 6:11 pm
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Lions are lazy slackers… sitting around all day stroking their manes when the the Lioness is out hunting and taking care of the cubs.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:13 pm
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I never could figure that one out.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:21 pm
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Excellence in evolution… The lioness knows she only needs the lion for one thing, that and he is rocking that cool mane.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:27 pm
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I used to have a cool mane but it has a hole in it now…. I call it my pink yarmulke.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:32 pm
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November 1st, 2009 at 6:40 pm
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Oh Indey, that’s too funny!!
November 1st, 2009 at 6:53 pm
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November 1st, 2009 at 6:14 pm
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And female spiders who kill and eat their mates. That always struck me as taking PMS a couple of steps too far.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:17 pm
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You see Bear’s comment down the thread….. you owe her thanks!!!
November 1st, 2009 at 6:26 pm
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Took a bit of searching but I found it. If the 82nd airborne ever run out of parachutes, I’ll give ‘em your phone number.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:30 pm
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Don’t. They’ve got “Taken” stickers on them.x.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:22 pm
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Like the Praying Mantis that decapitates her mate once the deed is done.
You do know we only keep you around to take out the garbage, right? Hehehehe…
November 1st, 2009 at 6:25 pm
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I wash the dishes too (but only cos I do a better job of it than any wimmens).
November 1st, 2009 at 6:29 pm
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You are definitely a keeper Indy…
November 1st, 2009 at 6:39 pm
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But I don’t do windows.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:45 pm
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That’s okay, you can play music which gets you all sorts of leeways.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:30 pm
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My Dad mopped the floor, and he taught me how to iron a shirt.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:35 pm
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my dad taught me everything … then he disappeared, to start a new family with a new wife only a few years older than his spawn.
my mother remained frozen in zombie land, per her yoosh state … until one day she found JEEBUS in Jack Boots at the megachurch
November 1st, 2009 at 6:41 pm
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What a drag.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:02 pm
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Sigh. Are you still getting emails from her?
November 1st, 2009 at 7:18 pm
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nope, nada. like we never existed. only makes me sad for my kids
November 1st, 2009 at 6:37 pm
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The only thing my dad taught me was how to roll a joint.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:56 pm
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!!!!!
November 1st, 2009 at 7:01 pm
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November 1st, 2009 at 7:04 pm
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November 1st, 2009 at 6:55 pm
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My dad taught me how to throw a football, hit a softball, and toss in a left-handed layup.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:07 pm
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My dad never taught me anything.
But just by being him, he showed me how to be loving,kind and tolerant.Hopefully, a teensy weensy,itsy bitsy bit of it may have rubbed off.
Oh forgot… he taught me to drive……
November 1st, 2009 at 7:09 pm
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My dad taught me how to improvise a blues solo.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:12 pm
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Ahhhhh…. and you do it so well.x.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:28 pm
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my horsetail seagrass is covered in praying mantis right now. they are so awesome!
I have huge families of lizards, the largest swarm of honey bees I’ve seen in years, and all sorts of cool critters right now.
hard to believe it’s November
November 1st, 2009 at 6:30 pm
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They are so fascinating to watch… almost alien creepy like. To many 50’s horror movies perhaps.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:33 pm
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nothing about them creeps me out. the only thing that creeps me out here is rats.
I’m not bothered by any of the bugs, reptiles, birds or animals … except rats.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:38 pm
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They don’t creep me out, they just move kind of creepy. I like rats too… only thing that freaks me out are spiders.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:30 pm
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I like spiders just fine … so long as they stay out of my sleeping area
November 1st, 2009 at 6:16 pm
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But seroiusly, we humans have the problem of lo-o-o-ong pregnancies and lo-o-o-o-o-o-ong childhoods to deal with that prevents us from allowing the lazy-ass men to behave in such a way. I’m not saying the male of the species wanted to take the responsibility way back in pre-history, but if the Dawkins “Selfish Gene” was gonna get anywhere, the behaviour was the only way to go.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:23 pm
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We need to have long childhoods… If our brains get any bigger in the womb there would be no natural way out. Other species have way longer gestation periods, like elephants and blue whales.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:32 pm
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sadly, childhoods are getting shorter and shorter all the time … for many reasons.
I guess it’s evolution.
doesn’t seem all that natural to me
November 1st, 2009 at 6:38 pm
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I don’t think it could be evolution, the time scale is wrong. Evolution happens on almost geologic scales but what we’re seeing now is something else. Of course, the “natural” length for a childhood (I guess) is much shorter than we’ve made it in modern times. We’re ready to reproduce in our early to mid teens but we have our childhood artificially extended by cultureal convention. That’s why there is always such a problem with stopping kids from having sex when they’re 14 years old, it’s hard-wired into our brains to schtupp as soon as we’re capable in order to replicate the genes with as much chance of success as possible. The fact that society (and especially religion of all stripes) doesn’t see it that way keeps the psychiatrists in Caddilacs and Rolexes.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:40 pm
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Biological childhoods are getting shorter because of pollution… mental childhoods are getting shorter for a million reasons.
Been a long time since I have seen a couple kids running around in field being wowed by daisies.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:32 pm
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you have to look to a very young child, like under 3 years, to see them wowed by a field of daisies … unless they’re tripping on something, of course
November 1st, 2009 at 7:46 pm
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I am still wowed by that, and I don’t have to be trippin either.
I love daisies.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:32 pm
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On the brain thing, persackly, on the longer gestation periods, they’re less “inconvenient” on other species. The relative size of the homan female and the human fetus is, I understand, quite unique. (Feel free to correct me if I’m off-base).
November 1st, 2009 at 6:42 pm
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The area in the pelvis is our disadvantage, I think it is that pesky bipedalism…
November 1st, 2009 at 6:53 pm
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That pesky bipedalism is a pain in the arse in so many ways. That’s the trouble with evolution, it doesn’t plan ahead. When something happens to work, it’s adopted and you have to put up with the disadvantages that go with it, like backaches, bad knees and (for us fellers) a pain that comes from things dangling at the wrong angle year after year (I won’t go into any more detail than that).
November 1st, 2009 at 6:57 pm
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LOL! I know… and why didn’t our sinuses compensate by now for us walking upright. Its been millions of years for cripes sake!
November 1st, 2009 at 7:04 pm
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I don’t think we’ve been on two legs that long…. A million years, tops. If something doesn’t stop you from reproducing successfully, you keep it, simple as that. That’s why we have things like diabetes 2 and altzheimers…. By the time it hits you, you’ve already had kids so you’ve passed on the gene. Things that kill you before you’re fourteen get strained out of the population. I can’t figure out snoring, though…. snorers should have been filtered out of the gene pool millions and millions of years ago. Advertising your presence to predators while you’re most vulnerable is not a real good idea. (I suppose kids don’t snore much, though).
November 1st, 2009 at 7:22 pm
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We have actually been strutting our stuff now for around 5 million years, give or take. No one can agree on why we stood up though.
It was probably so we could reach the tasty bud on the top of the plant… then we had to learn how to make fire to take advantage of said tasty bud. Evolution is great!
November 1st, 2009 at 7:30 pm
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Yeah, but that halted my personal evolution for about twenty years!
November 1st, 2009 at 7:48 pm
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I was going to make a totally nerdy, geeky joke about that, until I realized how nerdy and geeky it was.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:54 pm
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By the way, I’m rather partial to that area in your pelvis.
Nah…. I should have left it alone…. Too easy!
November 1st, 2009 at 6:59 pm
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Don’t you dare leave it alone…….
November 1st, 2009 at 7:10 pm
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November 1st, 2009 at 7:17 pm
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That’s my boy !!!!!
November 1st, 2009 at 7:03 pm
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Hehehehe… it was easy!
November 1st, 2009 at 6:25 pm
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My Dad would have liked you, Indy. He said all that you just said at one time or another.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:30 pm
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Including “tittys and beer”?
November 1st, 2009 at 7:44 pm
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Most excellent analysis there, sirrah. It does seem that technology has won some battles for women’s rights. But there are always Neanderthals who won’t choose to progress with the rest of us.
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back in the very early days of FRT we discussed this great Mother Jones piece, “The Purpose-Driven Wife”
http://www.motherjones.com/media/2009/03/books-purpose-driven-wife
kinda’ fun to read the comments from that time
http://freerangetalk.com/?p=6608
November 1st, 2009 at 6:02 pm
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That was a great read.
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where are all the Ranger men? surely they have mothers and sisters and wives and daughters.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:19 pm
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…and ex-wives….
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it’s only 2:52???? yikes!
85 degrees, just finished lobster and margaritas by the lake. ready for Dexter and Mad Men and Curb.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:32 pm
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Now that’s an area where men certainly outrank the women. Way more men serial killers then there are women.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:33 pm
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that we know of … I’m guessing far more women have “gotten away” with it than we could imagine
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I just saw this which is kind of funny…
The difference between the sexes when buying shoes. A flow chart:
http://www.cracked.com/funny-2422-shoes/
November 1st, 2009 at 5:21 pm
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Hilarious. And so true.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:28 pm
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November 1st, 2009 at 5:28 pm
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I have a decided weakness for shoes.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:39 pm
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I have 87 pairs…. In addition i have 9 new pairs I have not worn yet and 2 pairs of boots that are untouched.
After Barcelona, when His Nibs discovered my weakness for shoe shops he has drawn up a set of rules.For every minute he has to endure in shoe and bag shops….. I have to endure the equivalent in DIY warehouses whilst he drools over drills and stuff……. No fair.
P.S. Don’t get me started on bags……….
November 1st, 2009 at 5:41 pm
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Sounds a very good arrangement you have with His Nibs! Vintage shops are my downfall.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:55 pm
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You think you’ve got problems!!!!! I work in Antique Markets… argghhh.
For my birthday , I treated myself (again) to the most beautiful Edwardian evening bag.. Sterling silver scrolled frame, and the bag is silk, totally covered in bead embroidery of beautiful flowers on a dark grey background… lined in peach silk…. to die for…….. and I also got a 1960’s Balenciaga bag in taupe leather….. (Got a good deal, as I’m friendly with the dealer, but still expensive… but, hey, t’was me birfday, so thrrphhhhhhh!!)
November 1st, 2009 at 6:08 pm
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No comment.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:21 pm
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That was the perfect save, dear heart.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:42 pm
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We are so going shopping when I’m next in London, scouser.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:44 pm
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If you like Vintage…. I’m your gal……
How often do you get over here???
November 1st, 2009 at 6:58 pm
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Hmmm…. I think I’ll be watching a football game that day…..
November 1st, 2009 at 7:10 pm
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Deal !!! x
November 1st, 2009 at 5:41 pm
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so not true in my house. Rainman is waaaaaaay more into shopping than I. not complaining
November 1st, 2009 at 5:42 pm
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I don’t hear that very often, but mazel tov!
November 1st, 2009 at 5:51 pm
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he can outshop me easy … even can outshop 15 y/o daughter. it’s very strange.
when I first met him, I taught him “how” to shop. now I wonder how wise that was.
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If you want an early conservative woman’s viewpoint, before it got tangled up with religion, try Taylor Caldwell’s “Glory and the Lightning.” It’s a novel set in Ancient Greece. It might surprise you.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:11 pm
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I’ve enjoyed a couple of Taylor Caldwell’s books, wonderful narrative voice. ‘The Pillar of Iron’ was very good.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:23 pm
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You would like this one. If we think we have it tough now, we have come a long way from there.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:27 pm
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I’ll look for that, really enjoy historical novels. Ancient Greece was a real tangle, all those strong goddesses, yet on earth the gals certainly did have a tough go of it.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:33 pm
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The conscious mind wasn’t really ready for a woman’s strength of being & yet it was pushing up from under. One of the interesting things in the book is how she explores the separation of East and West which was beginning to occur.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:35 pm
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Sounds fascinating, that was an interesting period of history.
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I love that first painting “Dulcinea”.
November 1st, 2009 at 4:46 pm
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Phenomenal artist, I should find a blurb. She’s based in Florida, and recently had a focus in the International Museum of Women’s ‘Women, Power and Politics’ exhibition.
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Great post HB.
Many of the great qualities women possess need to be left by the wayside if you want to rise to the top in a male dominated field.
I don’t think it’s necessary to be better than a man, but in many ways you need to think, act and be as ruthless as a man if you want to climb the corporate ladder in America.
CEOs aren’t smarter, tougher, or more masculine than the middle management underneath them. They are simply more ruthless, more adept at stealing others’ work, taking credit for others’ achievements, and expert at shifting the blame on others when their projects fail. The women who rise to the top in the corporate world have embraced these qualities, and left everything of worth behind.
I also believe that women in politics have many of the same qualities that CEOs embrace. I don’t admire someone because of their ability to climb a ladder, or break a glass ceiling. The idea of success in America is trite and shallow. Real achievement is being able to pursue what you feel you must, without compromising your values, ethics, or letting anything or anyone stand in your way.
Women need to start ignoring men, in order to gain power. It’s not men holding women back, it’s women, embracing a man’s point of view, when it’s impossible to dispute that in some areas, we have the upper hand, and in some areas, like the physical, we cannot compete.
Equality is a nice concept, but since most women have different priorities, different bodies, different brains, we will never be the same as men, nor should we strive to play by their rules, nor beat them at their own game.
We win when we ignore the stereotyping of women. We win when we ignore the way corporations try to strip women of their money through advertising campaigns designed to attack womens’ self of self in an effort to convince them that they not only need to compete with other women for the attention of men, but they need to change themselves; their clothes, their hair, their skin, their breast size, their occupation, their hobbies, their desires in order to fit into societies’ norms and “catch” a man.
Regardless of how far women have come, until women give up on the idea that marrying a man, or living their lives through a man, is somehow going to give them what they want, there will always be a large percentage of the population that is unhappy and unconsciously controlled by men.
November 1st, 2009 at 4:20 pm
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You hit a number of nails on the head there, bg. I think a great amount of ‘unhappiness’ is based on not knowing or recognizing that our emotional stability and esteem needs to come from within, not from a spouse, partner or any man.
The larger issue of societal imaging fostering negative competition among women themselves (and hammering self-esteem) is so important to acknowledge. I hate that young girls grow up seeing and absorbing all of that advertising, media and marketing.
Maybe it’s because I married so late in life, and spent years doing for myself, but it seems there’s somewhat of a backslide in terms of imaging. Reality shows aren’t helping, the various housewives and swapping wives and bachelorettes don’t seem to be giving anyone stellar role models.
November 1st, 2009 at 4:25 pm
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How can we focus on being the best we can be, when we need to find the lotion/potion to make our skin glow and reduce crow’s feet?
November 1st, 2009 at 4:39 pm
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I like growing older and the only magic potion I use is sun screen in my moisturizer… Never been into all the omg I have to look 12 obsessiveness.
November 1st, 2009 at 4:56 pm
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November 1st, 2009 at 4:48 pm
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That particular issue makes me nutz … then there’s the amount of money involved in researching and marketing the potions, that could be resourced for health and science purposes.
I told dave that if I ever looked to be heading for a hundred dollar+ skin cream, to snap me out of it. I earned these wrinkles.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:09 pm
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Exactly… I think Botox is from the devil
November 1st, 2009 at 4:37 pm
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I never understood why women are so competitive with other women. Doesn’t make much sense really when the only person you have to compete with is yourself.
I think women are moving away from the notion that somehow we need to marry, or have the favors of a man to make us who we are and to make us happy. I don’t see many younger women feeling that way at all, and are way more correct in their thinking that they can achieve and be worth as much as any man.
November 1st, 2009 at 4:58 pm
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I hope so. I worry about the conservative trends, and the traditionalist backlash that always seems to erupt and then follow a Democratic administration.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:13 pm
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I would worry about that too, but something I realized about the election is that a lot of our generations social expectations have not been embraced by the younger generation.
I think if you told a young girl today that she couldn’t be an astronaut because she is a girl that she would kick you in the shins for saying so. I think the times have changed us in a lot of ways.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:17 pm
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The pendulum always seeks a balance & for every 2 steps forward we take 1 step back. It is a little like kids pushing the envelope til they reach adulthood. Our consciousness has to grow to meet new ideas & sometimes that happens a lot slower than we’d like.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:01 pm
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Yeah, agreed, but there is still the culture of competitiveness in younger women, even teens, unfortunately. Cosmo is still publishing “20 ways to please your man”. :majoreyeroll:
November 1st, 2009 at 5:15 pm
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I don’t think there is anything wrong with wanting to please your man, if that means what I think it means….
But if you are talking about learning how to be a subservient hag for some guys approval, that would be wrong.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:31 pm
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I think the articles should be “20 ways to please yourself.”
November 1st, 2009 at 5:34 pm
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Indeed! That magazine would fly off the online shelves.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:52 pm
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Cosmo is still publishing “20 ways to please your man”…
I don’t have a problem with that…. Just sayin’….
But seriously, folks…
November 1st, 2009 at 5:55 pm
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haven’t read Cosmo in many many years … in fact, haven’t even heard or said the word Cosmo in many a moon, other than SATC bar order.
pretty sure most of the planet has moved on
November 1st, 2009 at 5:59 pm
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Yeah, but the 15th way , we got arrested……. just sayin’
November 1st, 2009 at 6:09 pm
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And they won’t let us in the frozen food section of the supermarket any more….
November 1st, 2009 at 6:14 pm
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November 1st, 2009 at 6:05 pm
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speaking of attacking women at the wallet … I’ve noticed this odd trend lately of products being shoved down our throats, and then being discontinued, which leads to this frenzy of thinking you need to replace the discontinued item with 2 or 7 or 11 other products to find the perfect replica.
it’s beyond brilliant marketing, though clearly sick and twisted
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one thing that has been bothering me a lot lately is the hypocrisy of the rightwing conservative women who spend their lives traveling the country trying to sell the anti-feminist gender rolls. These women go on and on about a woman’s role is in the home, OBEYing the man, raising the children — yet they are doing the exact opposite in their own lives.
Even James Dobson’s daughter, in her early 40s, is single and travels year-round selling her books and giving seminars to young girls convincing them that they should submit to the male authoritarian figures in their lives.
ugh
November 1st, 2009 at 3:28 pm
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None of that makes any sense at all. Do they ever explain why that is okay beyond their claims to having to be a leader? Ugh, ugh ugh…
November 1st, 2009 at 3:47 pm
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Didn’t you know about the Heavenly Dispensation for the Elite?
November 1st, 2009 at 3:51 pm
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I did not… of course, how silly of me.
November 1st, 2009 at 4:08 pm
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Andrea Dworkin wrote a great essay on Republican women. I can’t find it online, but it does explain the psychological mindset and hypocrisy of Republican women. In a nutshell, what I took away from her writing is that Republican women aren’t really women. As Gloria Steinhem would say, they are “female impersonators”.
November 1st, 2009 at 4:15 pm
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Ha! I remember well that theory of Gloria’s, I wonder what she has been saying lately about repub women …
November 1st, 2009 at 4:28 pm
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I think she repeated that statement in regards to KBH.
November 1st, 2009 at 4:53 pm
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I loved her take on La Palin, “She is Phyllis Schlafly, only younger.”
November 1st, 2009 at 5:02 pm
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That is perfect.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:43 pm
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I’m picturing Quitbull Sarah eating a Crunch Wrap and hiding from her “retarded kid”
I really do wonder if Levi’s spill is true or embellished. I might be biased, but I tend to believe it
November 1st, 2009 at 6:11 pm
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I tend to believe it. She has never struck me as overly maternal. I mean, anybody who obviously doesn’t tell her daughter the facts of life???????????????????
November 1st, 2009 at 4:42 pm
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That’s perfect… female impersonators.
November 1st, 2009 at 4:26 pm
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The research I did on complementarians was scary, kel. I could have written a few pages just on their retro beliefs, not to mention the gyrations they had to undertake to support or demonize La Palin, depending on whether they decided to back her or not. And they are pretty mainstream, present in churches like Rick Warren’s, and the Southern Baptist Convention congregations.
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I find it totally incomprehensible that women, because of their own insecurities, turn on each other. But they do. Those of us who had mothers who had to work outside the home, are indeed blessed, twice, because they did it and, also because the men in the house knew of the contribution and approved. When my mother met my father, there was a Depression going on and her mother, my grandmother, was often the only breadwinner in the house. He had to have been bemused by this working class reality, being from a slightly higher social standard. But he married Mom anyway, and never looked back. By the time I came along he was something of a hybrid, knowing that without my mother we would not have what we had, but still wishing it could be different. And, by the time of his death he was a feminist who had great respect for women.
Good post, Hardybear.
November 1st, 2009 at 3:16 pm
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Men turn on each other all the time, and I am wondering when women get so upset when we do the same. It seems to me that it is a human trait to turn on each other, and not a trait specific to one sex.
In no way to I mean to say that it isn’t wrong to do that, it really is an awful thing to do to anyone, male for female. I just wonder why it is looked at as gender specific to be worse when we do it.
I think I am being to thinky about it…
November 1st, 2009 at 3:20 pm
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men turn on each other and have cat fights — but are rarely called out as bitchy or dramatic.
November 1st, 2009 at 3:29 pm
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That is definitely true.
November 1st, 2009 at 3:41 pm
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Men don’t call it a cat fight. It’s a fist fight or a brawl.
November 1st, 2009 at 4:28 pm
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I can’t stand that term, cat fight. You’re right kit, men give it a different name and more respect.
November 1st, 2009 at 3:25 pm
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You have the right of it, Noch. Sometimes when I start something it never comes out the way I started and this is one of those times. For some reason I’ve had my Dad on my mind lately. Ridiculous in a way, he’s been gone a long time. I think it’s because of things going on & I wonder what he would think of it all.
November 1st, 2009 at 3:30 pm
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I thought what you said was fine. It just made me wonder why it seems so much worse in general when women do it. I must be musing badly out loud.
November 1st, 2009 at 3:39 pm
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I think the reason we make a note of women more than men is that women tend to be bitchier about it.
November 1st, 2009 at 3:41 pm
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I think bitchy is the wrong word. Women get personal. Men usually fight cleaner.
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This is some post Bear!!!!!
Yet another superb goodie…….. you’re smarter than the average bear Hardy……..
November 1st, 2009 at 4:59 pm
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merci, scouser.
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Men and women are men and women second.
They are people…. a person first…… then comes the gender differences.
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Is it terrible that I am not a feminist, and that I wasn’t upset when Hillary conceded the race?
November 1st, 2009 at 2:52 pm
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Of course not. We should have the freedom to be and feel whatever is right for each of us.
November 1st, 2009 at 2:57 pm
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I think the feminist movement really put me off. To many radical man hating women out there. I can’t get with that kind of thinking.
Of course I believe in equal rights for women in everything, I am just not a “I am woman here me roar” kind of person.
Men and women are each better at some things than the opposite sex is. I have always seen us as equals, who obviously have to work together for the survival of the species.
If someone else thinks that we aren’t basically equals it means that person in an idiot.
November 1st, 2009 at 3:35 pm
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They definitely put me off. I believe in equal pay and all the rest but…………… Damn I LOVE MEN. You should definitely read Nora Roberts. In the forward to”Sea Swept” she writes “I like men. I’d better as I have four older brothers. I grew up outnumbered, then had two sons and continued to be in the minority.” she goes on to say that she enjoys “exploring the dynamics between men, brothers, fathers and sons, friends.”
November 1st, 2009 at 4:32 pm
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In college, some of the really radical ‘man-haters’ were a challenge to be around, and there could be a certain stigma if you weren’t as gung ho ~ but it didn’t turn me off the movement in general. I just drifted into seeing a women’s issue in virtually every topic I learned or wrote about, and don’t even really know why. Still do, to a degree.
But I’ve never looked critically upon anyone who doesn’t feel the urge to fight that fight in overt ways, or roar. The movement should have given us the right to choose how we want to define ourselves without having to justify it.
November 1st, 2009 at 4:58 pm
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I have had many bad experiences with feminists, including a few who tried to kick my ass a few times because I wasn’t completely obsessed with feminism. I happen to like my bras, a lot.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:03 pm
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Whoa, that’s alarming … I’ve been hit on, but never hit at.
I wish I liked bras, spend more time figuring out how not to have to sport them for utilitarian purposes.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:18 pm
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It is rather odd how often I have been threatened because I wasn’t inclined to hate another group of people.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:11 pm
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The whole bra burning thing was so pointless and trivial. Many of the arguments used in the women’s movement during the seventies were ultimately, self defeating.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:19 pm
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I feel there was some valid symbolism there, much as corsets were finally(!) given short shrift and Amanda Bloomer succeeded in championing ‘rational’ undergarments in the 1850’s. Any situation where your morals are considered inferior or questionable if you use or skip an article of clothing seems quite political to me.
Watch a man react to a woman who is clearly bra-less. Even Larry David.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:29 pm
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But bras weren’t designed for men. Unless you’re an A or B cup, you really need the support. I am more comfortable with a bra on than off.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:33 pm
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I can never wait to get out of mine, but am not tremendously well endowed.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:40 pm
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Lucky girl. You and my niece. I wish I were so fortunate. I think she is beginning to see the advantages.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:42 pm
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I must have got your share!!!!!!
November 1st, 2009 at 5:43 pm
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November 1st, 2009 at 5:48 pm
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Thanks.Indy will thank you……..
November 1st, 2009 at 6:14 pm
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Have I mentioned “The Corset Diaries” by Katie MacAkiser? OMG a riot.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:12 pm
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I like being feminine, also, too, Noch. Wearing pretty underthings & perfume should not be dissed. After all men like to look attractive too, don’t think they don’t. My brother-in-law is so amusing. I have caught him looking in the mirror a couple of times.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:24 pm
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I’m super ‘girlie’, and not giving up my lingerie or parfum anytime soon … just want to use them on my own terms, not because I’m told I have to to be attractive.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:37 pm
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You don’t have to listen to the adverts, Ms Bear. Just do your own thing. I have never used face cream in my life for very long at a time. I just have better things to spend my money & time on.
November 1st, 2009 at 6:07 pm
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Also makeup… too and such!
November 1st, 2009 at 3:21 pm
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some very strong women fought long and hard to afford each of us the choice to have our own opinions about feminism
November 1st, 2009 at 3:37 pm
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Yes, women before me did a lot to make my life more fair.
I don’t think there is anything wrong with women who want to be feminists or work for the feminist cause. I am just not personally into it. I am more into basic human rights for everyone.
For example, in my opinion everyone should have the right to vote, it is a human right. Shouldn’t be about gender, race, religion, or anything like that. That is angle I think about it from.
November 1st, 2009 at 3:44 pm
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November 1st, 2009 at 4:33 pm
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Exactly. Just so long as conservatives don’t succeed in moving us backwards.
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Nicely done Bear…
More women won Nobel Prizes this year than all the previous years combined.
November 1st, 2009 at 2:41 pm
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That is so fabulous, really a coup.
November 1st, 2009 at 2:52 pm
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Way more women are getting the proper credit they are due, and that has made more women enter science. Especially in government agencies, like NASA, women in science are way more respected than they were back in the 60’s. Among other things they get to be Astronauts now.
There is also some speculation to the thought that women are better then men at science. Our brains are better wired for scientific thinking.
November 1st, 2009 at 2:55 pm
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Great point, that. My cousin was the first woman to graduate in aeronautical engineering at her school, but says there are more females at NASA now than then (ten years ago).
That research on what our brains are wired for is fascinating, I think. Do post any links you have on that, if you think of it, noch.
November 1st, 2009 at 3:01 pm
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I am rather addicted to brain science… The brain is the most amazing thing on the planet to me. I must be part Zombie.
I will pass along anything interesting I come across.
November 1st, 2009 at 4:34 pm
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Thanks.
I know more about the effects of brain injury that about the brain before it’s damaged.
November 1st, 2009 at 3:00 pm
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MMMMMMMMM…. must have missed out on that it of wiring.
BUT….. I find women are better at lateral thinking than blokes…. so, it’s sorta along the same lines……..
November 1st, 2009 at 3:01 pm
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Bit not it… oops… missed out on the typo wiring too, also.
November 1st, 2009 at 3:10 pm
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Couldn’t decide whether or not to include this, but for nostalgia’s sake:
November 1st, 2009 at 7:20 pm
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Oh, I so remember this! Yes, this was the right place to post it.